The Vain Game
Filed Under (The Fam) by Amy on 10-23-2007
The other day we were at my parents’ house watching the Eagle’s game (man, it hurts just to type that) and my mom made a comment to Aric that it looked like he lost some weight. I was so perturbed when she said that! The child is 11 years old and he’s a little chunky, but I think he’s going to have his whole life to worry about his weight - I don’t want him even thinking about that kind of stuff right now! I know he already is, and has been for years and that just makes me sad.
I guess it’s all just bringing up painful memories for me. My mom and other relatives put so much importance on weight and appearances and I want to shield my kids from that as much as possible. I didn’t say anything to my mom - I didn’t want to make an issue out of it in front of Aric and it slipped my mind later - but I think I still want to address it with her. I’ll have to do some work around coming up with the right words to say.
Can’t wait.
Oh boy does that hit a nerve with me. My mom took me to weight watcheers at nine years old. All I can say is traumatizing! I think you have the right idea. :)
Maybe she thought she was complimenting him??? *sigh* Issues are so hard to deal with. And no matter what you do and how careful you are, your kids will have issues to work out from their childhood. It’s just hard.
I think she meant well, but yeah….it can be something to worry about even at that age. It shouldn’t be. Teaching the kids to live healthy is more important than anything else and we know it’s harder these days than when we were young.
I don’t blame you for wanting to talk to her about it. Eleven is a tough enough age as it is.
I have to have the very same conversation with my mom for the same reasons, Amy. My mom always fusses about how “skinny” Kassidy is - and in doing so, implies that it’s a good, enviable thing. It really bothers me and so I need to have ‘the talk’.
I think one useful angle for talking to you mom would be to point out likelihood of all kinds of negative and mixed messages about weight from his friends and the media. Your family should be a refuge from that, not more of the same.
Praying for you since I know that is going to be a hard conversation. I agree kids have it hard as it is with friends and the media harping on them. They need to have family accept them as they are.