Today I celebrate another milestone on my path of recovery.

Six years ago today I walked into my first 12-step meeting and I haven’t looked back since. I’m celebrating being abstinent from compulsive overeating as well as being sober - two very big things! Looking back, I don’t think I would have willingly decided to do both on the same day, but it just worked out that way for me since I landed a food plan that had no sugar. No sugar = no alcohol.

On this date six years ago, I was nervous and excited. I was eager to try something new where my eating was concerned, but I had no real idea what I was getting myself into. In the following days, I would go through a horrible detox that kept me in bed with massive headaches, cold sweats, and bouts of vomiting and diarrhea. The withdrawals hit me hard. I don’t ever want to go through that again. And if I keep doing the same thing I’ve been doing the past six years - one day at a time - I won’t have to.

For the visuals among us, here’s a little photo trip down memory lane.

Almost 7 years ago, partying at Colleen’s family shore house:

A llittle over 6 years ago at my sister-in-law’s baby shower:

About 5 1/2 years ago, 4 months into my journey:

About 1 1/2 years ago with my friend, Deb:

And a more recent one, a couple months ago:

I need to take some updated pictures of myself. I’ve been slacking in that department for some reason! I got my hair done on Saturday and it looks fabulous. I’ll try to remember to do that this week.

Last week, I made the decision to take dairy out of my diet. It was an unexpected thing - I never would have thought that I’d take even more out of my food plan considering I already don’t eat sugar, flour, wheat, caffeine, cheese, cherries, grapes, gum, and I’m sure a few other things I’m forgetting at the moment. My Greek yogurts were something I looked forward to with much delight every night. I loved getting a dollop of skim foam in my Americanos at Starbucks. I drank a full 8 oz. of 2% milk every morning with breakfast. Things between dairy and me seemed to be going just fine.

But then I started coming across random articles that spoke about the benefits of a dairy-free existence. At first I paid little attention, I felt secure in my dietary habits and I wasn’t looking for a change of any sort. The articles, though, they kept appearing. I finally decided to take heed and I read one. Then another. And another… which led me to hours of searching to find out all I could about the awful side effects of dairy and what I could expect if I stopped consuming it. Visions of increased energy, no PMS, the departure of adult acne, regular (& neat) bowel movements, and losing those last 10 pounds began to dance across my mind. After some time I decided I had nothing to lose by trying the Go Dairy Free 10-Day Challenge, and so I embarked on the latest journey of my ever-evolving food plan.

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve spent my spare time researching. Once I was open to the idea of no more dairy, my brain became insatiable - I had to learn all I could. What I discovered led to my destination for today: I could no longer eat animal products without feeling squeamish about the things I was putting into my body. I’ve been saying for years that I eat for nourishment only, and now I’ve got too much knowledge to eat the things I held dear for so long without feeling like a complete hypocrite.

What started out as hapless blog surfing has somehow turned into a complete lifestyle change. Funny how that works. And now I’ve got a brand new label: Ovo Vegetarian, which means I will eat eggs (for the moment!) but no meat or dairy products.

Although I took dairy out over a week ago, I’m pretty sure there was butter in the meals I had in restaurants on Saturday. I also had meat (tilapia and chicken) and I was feeling the effects of not having a clean meal all day. I’ve been a vegetarian for 3 days now and my stomach is starting to rebel a bit. I think I’m officially in the detox stage. Hopefully since my diet was so clean prior to this change, I won’t suffer too many ill effects before I start reaping some of the rewards. I’ve already noticed an increased amount of energy in the form of not needing as much sleep each night. You can be assured I’ll keep you updated on my progress as I embark on this new adventure in my quest for better health.

And no, I won’t be having Tofurky on Thursday! Gross.

I went down to Rehoboth Beach again this past weekend. I go there every 6 months for a business function for one of my 12-step groups. This assembly was special since we had regional representatives from all over the world who came to share their experience, strength, and hope with us. I’ll be posting more about that in detail on my recovery blog. (Email me for the URL if you don’t have it - I like to stay pretty anonymous over there since I talk openly about the 12-step programs I’m in.)

One of the guys who went down to the assembly from my group got really ill right before we were set to leave. At first we thought he was just being dramatic and perhaps a bit of a hypochondriac. He thought he was dehydrated, and wanted to go to a hospital. He doesn’t drive, so he was depending on the person who provided his transportation to take him to the hospital. Rehoboth Beach is about 3 hours away from home for all of us, so the woman who was his ride was in a bit of a quandary. She wanted to do the right thing, but she wasn’t sure where her responsibility as his ride began and ended. In the end, she decided to take him to the hospital and stay with him until she got news of his status.

Turns out, it was a good thing she stayed - our friend’s kidneys went into failure and he was unconscious and on a ventilator for some time. We were all pretty worried about what was going to happen to him, but today he had a miraculous turn for the better. He’s awake and in good spirits; I’m so grateful.

That whole experience was so surreal and I haven’t been able to get my mind off of it. I was so relieved when I got the good news this afternoon. Hopefully it will continue to be good news.

I also had some other excitement today. My new cell phone came in! I got the Samsung SCH u740 and I am absolutely in love with this thing. I can’t stop playing with it! I made sure to send Colleen a text message right away to show off my newfound texting prowess. I think she was duly impressed. Which? Was not a shocker. My texting brings all the boys to the yard, you know what I’m sayin’? Yaeah.

All kinds of good stuff is happening at work now, too. I can’t really go into too many details about it here, but I will tell you about Google soon, I promise!

Last weekend, I had the pleasure of spending a bunch of time with a group of recovering food addicts. We were together for the whole weekend, so we had to go out to eat a few times. You haven’t lived until you’ve gone to a restaurant with 10 recovering food addicts who all have special needs regarding their food. To top it off, we went to Chinatown of all places. We spent a good deal of time walking into different restaurants just to ask if they had brown rice. Do you know I walked into a place that had a tank of live frogs sitting in front? ICK!

When the food came, people were whipping out food scales, measuring cups and spoons, and spices seemingly out of nowhere. I was seriously impressed with how prepared some people were - especially compared to me! I knew there would be plenty of food scales, so I didn’t even bring one of those. Yes, I am that person: the food scale moocher. I really need to get a better digital pocket scale so I can stop being that person. I’ve never been one to bring my measuring cup out to a restaurant, they’re just too cumbersome to be carrying around. However, that all changed today.

One of the girls we went to dinner with had one of these collapsible cups that just blew my little mind. The cups collapse to lay flat for storage and then pop open when you need to use them to measure. No more excuses for not having a measuring cup with me when I’m out. I got those and the cool swivel measuring spoons, too, at Williams-Sonoma. You have no idea how excited I am about these cups. It felt like Christmas morning around here today. I couldn’t wait to get home to just hold the cups in my hand and expand and collapse them endlessly as I marveled at the ingenuity of people. Why can’t I think of something like this?

Continuing where I left off…

Friday night after my share and the meeting that followed, I found out a bunch of fun women from Myrtle Beach, South Carolina were also staying in my cabin. I was glad about that, since they were an absolute riot from what little I saw of them. I was looking forward to spending the weekend with them. On Saturday, I wanted to sleep in a bit since I didn’t get to bed until pretty late the night before and I also got my period (good times). However, the rabble rousers from South Carolina made all kinds of noise getting up around 6 AM. It wasn’t so bad, I did get to lay there for a bit and then when I got up I was able to take my time getting ready.

I also took that time to finish my preparation for the speaking engagement I had for later that evening. Once 8 o’clock rolled around, I headed to the dining hall for breakfast, followed by listening to a friend share his personal story of recovery. It was great to just be able to sit and listen instead of being in the spotlight. This guy has an incredible story, too, he takes the disease of food addiction very seriously because he knows so many people who have died from it. Sad, but true. He shared a great metaphor that really made a lot of sense to me. He said that choosing to indulge in compulsive overeating is like going to a young tree and tying a rope to it, and a noose around your neck with the same rope. You won’t die today or in the near future from food addiction, because it’s a slow killer. But it will kill you and the death won’t be pretty. Sobering thoughts.

After the speaker shared, we went to our different workshops. I chose the one on honesty. It was a great group and an excellent meeting. Afterwards we had lunch followed by 3 hours of free time. There were a number of available activities to choose from - mountain biking, hiking, canoeing, kayaking, and rock climbing among them. I didn’t choose any of those, however. Instead, I went with a local guy and three elderly ladies to a local church to see some amazing frescoes and a labyrinth. I felt blessed to have the opportunity to see some of the local culture and experience this man’s church. I also felt jealous that his church was so incredible. I really want and need to find a church. Hopefully I can find one as nice as his.

Check out the frescoes in the main lobby of this church:

There are more of these in my Flickr, if you’re interested.

After we got to hear some interesting stories about the history of this man’s church, and viewed the frescoes at length, we took a walk outside to explore the labyrinth on the grounds past the cemetery.

I actually walked the path - it took more than 5 minutes to complete it one way! All told, we spent a couple of hours at the church, because we moved at a leisurely pace. On the way back to the retreat, he drove us by Moravian Falls. This picture doesn’t do the site justice - I had to take it from inside the car.

Once back at the retreat, it was time for another workshop. I chose to go back to my room and really retreat, though. I needed some quiet alone time. I finished my preparations for my final two speeches and then got inside my sleeping bag and read some of my novel. It felt delicious, but it was time for dinner all too soon. After dinner, it was time to do my talk on steps 4-6 and the principles associated with them. It went very well - I just quoted from our literature and shared my related experiences. There was entertainment that evening, but it was short-lived and unorganized. I spent most of that time talking quietly with one woman who wanted to know more about how I worked my food plan and program. I also spent some one-on-one time with a couple of other fantastic women.

I can’t say enough about how wonderful the people I met were. I’m excited to have new friends from different areas. I’m certain that at least some of our paths will cross again in the future.

Sunday was a short day at the retreat. I shared on steps 7-9 after breakfast and then we had the closing ceremonies and it was time for me to go home. I took with me a letter and a “love note” to remind me of my time there. Everyone there was asked to write an anonymous letter to someone as if it was their first time coming to program, then everyone took a letter when they left. Everyone also wrote their name on a piece of construction paper and hung it on a wall so everyone else could write little love notes on it all weekend. It was fun coming up with nice things to say to everyone. It was even better to read all of the wonderful things written on my paper when I took it down.

The trip back home was pretty uneventful. I was so glad to land in Philly, and even more happy to see my precious car sitting there waiting for me where I left her. I was so relieved to be home, and just vegged for the rest of the night. I missed my family like crazy while I was gone, and I was totally wiped out emotionally. It was a great experience, though, and I’m so glad I was able to have it. I’d say yes in a heartbeat if asked again in the future to speak somewhere.

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